The more I research habits, productivity, and mindset, the more I'm learning how important it is to set up structures that work with your tendencies.
I mentioned this very briefly in the blog post about setting up a daily schedule (link here), but it is much easier to set up a structure than try to change who you are. Obviously, we sometimes have to do things we don't like doing. For example, if you're not an early person but you have to be at work at 6:00 AM, then, sorry bud, you can't change that structure.
But not all hope is lost!
Queen of Habits, Gretchen Rubin, and her research on the 4 Tendencies has been groundbreaking for me and the way I think about setting up structures that work with my tendency and not against it.
In Gretchen Rubin's own words:
"By asking the one simple question, 'How do I respond to expectations?' we gain exciting insight into ourselves. And when we know how other people respond to expectations, we understand them far more effectively, as well.
We all face two kinds of expectations--outer expectations (meet work deadlines, answer a request from a friend) and inner expectations (keep a New Year’s resolution, start meditating). Our response to expectations determines our 'Tendency'—that is, whether we fit into the category of Upholder, Questioner, Obliger, or Rebel.
Knowing our Tendency can help us set up situations in the ways that make it more likely that we’ll achieve our aims. We can make better decisions, meet deadlines, meet our promises to ourselves, suffer less stress, and engage more deeply with others.
Just as important, knowing other people’s Tendencies helps us to work with them more effectively."
The 4 Tendencies
The 4 Tendencies are:
-Upholder: Upholds outer and inner expectations; wants to know what should be done
-Obliger: Is easier to uphold an outer expectation than an inner expectation; needs accountability
-Questioner: Will uphold expectations, but must know WHY the expectation is there in the first place; needs justification
-Rebel: Doesn't uphold outer or inner expectations; wants freedom to do something their own way
Which tendency are you? Yes, you might have qualities of all four, but which one is your main tendency? If you have two, which one feels the most detrimental or troublesome?
If you don't know which one you are, take The Four Tendencies Quiz:
Tomorrow, I'll be doing a post on how you can take your tendency and turn it into positive structures and positive self talk.
Tools and Resources
You are probably wondering this blog is about. Well, it's about anything that everything that I find inspiring, helpful, and curiosity building.
Curiosity is my favorite state of being, and I've become a treasure hunter and a trash hoarder, collecting all sorts of articles, artwork, and accessories that fuel my inspiration and creativity.
This will also be a place for me to document my life as an actor and coach in Los Angeles. If performing is your passion, I hope that this blog becomes a place for you to learn from my mistakes, grow from my accomplishments, laugh at my witless choices, and share in this crazy, unpredictable, beautiful, life in the arts.